Stay

Disclaimer,

I could gather a hundred reasons

to make it easier for you to leave me,

place them gently in your hands

like I’m doing you a kindness,

and still hope you refuse to believe them.

I have a habit of showing the worst of me first,

not out of courage,

but fear of being misunderstood later.

As if honesty could soften the fall

when things eventually break.

And when I run out of things to tear apart,

I’ll look at you quietly,

like I’m waiting for you

to tell me I’m wrong.

If I let you come close,

hold me like something that matters.

There are parts of me

that don’t know how to ask for care,

only how to hope for it in silence.

Find me in crowded rooms.

I disappear in ways that aren’t obvious.

I’ll be late more often than I should be,

not becausei am careless,

It's just the hesitation I can’t quite explain.

I’ve learned how to look steady,

even when I’m not.

Stay when I grow distant.

Stay when I become difficult to read.

Love me in the moments

I don’t make it easy to.

And please,

don’t make me feel like I am something

you have to endure.

I won’t always speak my wounds out loud.

Some of them exist quietly,

beneath things Idont know how to name.

People call me confident now.

They don’t know what it cost me

to stand here like this.

So don’t rush me into explanations.

Just don’t leave

before I learn how to open the door.

Show me what love looks like

when it’s real,

not something I have to question.

Somehow, without meaning to,

you’ve been there

in everything I write.